Filed under: church
in the spirit of a post a while back about the top ten frustrations of living in a thomas kinkade custom house, here are my top ten frustrations about living in the aforementioned christian subdivision:
10. constant presence of rainbow steals the wonder from your kids’ souls.
9. burning rage develops at the sheer quantity of fish on cars.
8. the idiots who live on ark street all stupidly think they have to have two pets.
7. mystery casseroles at hoa parties.
6. fines for not smiling.
5. fear of a michael moore documentary.
4. inability to identify the obviously rebellious teenager who keeps nailing stuffed animals on the cross in the park (though it’s probably that darn goth kid).
3. community movie nights are always “left behind” movie, with never-ending encouragement to “bring your unsaved friends!”.
2. no salt allowed.
and #1: nagging sense that this might just be hell.
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It could be worse … you could see that Jesus has a Myspace (Wait a minute I just read over on thinkchristian that He does) or that someone does marketing online with Jesus (JVwithJesus.com? anyone?) or … well there is more Jesus Junk out there including Christian Pirates. I just wonder when “Christians” will stop using “Christian” as an adjective. Oh well there’s always Steve Case and I playing with our Bobblehead Jesuses in both the White and African American versions … though I’d like the Asian version soon.
Comment by Gman 09.18.06 @ 6:46 pmI’m dying here, this stuff is really funny. On the other hand, it could be sadly too close to the truth. Rock on.
Comment by Rick 09.19.06 @ 12:44 am[…] ok, so while i was writing the top ten frustrations of living the aforementioned christian subdivision, my mind kept going to ideas that fit better under the heading of benefits (though certainly tongue-firmly-planted-in-cheek). so here they are: […]
Pingback by ysmarko 09.19.06 @ 1:22 pm[…] This was pretty hilarious. […]
Pingback by Top 10 Christian Subdivision Frustrations at Rusty Hinges 09.21.06 @ 7:25 pm[…] top ten frustrations about living in the aforementioned christian subdivision […]
Pingback by My Four Walls » Blog Archive » Christian-Themed Subdivisions 11.07.06 @ 1:01 pmLeave a comment
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too funny….finally a laugh to a long bad day…thanks
Comment by lizzy 09.18.06 @ 6:31 pm