really. i’m not making this up. kohler, an otherwise reputable maker of toilets and other plumbing tomfoolery, has released the C3 toilet seat, with remote control. it has “three temperature settings, bidet functionality, a warm-air fan for partial drying, a lighted bowl that eliminates the need to turn on a light at night, a deodorizer that minimizes unpleasant odors, a Quiet-Close cover that prevents slamming and a remote control. Just like the seating/driving/heating in a luxury auto, you can have “personal settings” adjustable by a remote control.”
the copy on kohler’s website says:
C3 toilet seats with bidet functionality use the naturally soothing quality of water as a refreshing, hygienic alternative to toilet tissue, offer cleanliness, comfort and convenience for all users.
Features two separate water nozzles for the anterior and posterior that spray the user with warm aerated water
Constructed of anti-microbial plastic
A user sensor ensures someone is sitting on the seat before the functions are activated
Heated seat with three different temperature settings
Quiet-Close™ Quick-Release™ toilet seat
Side arm control provides user-friendly function controls
Lighted bowl eliminates the need to turn on a light at night
Energy save mode reduces energy consumption when the seat is not in use
NOTE: Requires 120V, 15A, 60 Hz electrical receptacle protected by Class A GFCI
and it list prices for “$750.00 and up”.
all of this raises a few questions in my mind…
1. who spends $750 on a toilet seat?
2. if it’s $750 “and up”, what’s the “up”? and what more do you get if you are willing to pay the “up”?
3. i’m really not sure i want a “warm air fan for partial drying”. in fact, i’m not even sure it’s morally appropriate.
4. where would one keep the remote control? and when would one use it? while sitting on the seat, or while approaching it?
5. is the C3 web-enabled? because maybe then i’d be interested…
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